In Which I Wax Eloquent About Cabbage

"What a superbly featured room and what excellent boiled potatoes. It is many years since I had such an exemplary vegetable. To which of my fair cousins should I compliment the excellence of the cooking?" Mr. Collins, BBC's Pride and Prejudice

Brussels sprouts were on my grocery list this week. Since I was a child, they have been my favorite vegetable. I wanted to roast them, so fresh was imperative. As I perused the produce section of Wegmans, I found that Brussels sprouts were $2.99/lb. but plain ol' cabbage was a mere $0.79/lb. When I left the store, I was carrying two nice heads of red cabbage and not a single sprout, from Brussels or otherwise.

I discovered a while ago that I love most vegetables roasted. Cruciferous vegetables are some of my favorites. Until now, I've always coated them in oil and salt. Today, I just put a head of cabbage, sliced into eight wedges, into a 400*F oven and let it bathe in the heat for 45 minutes, with one flip for even cooking.

In the midst of the cooking, I asked my roommate if she smelled baking bread. When I took the cabbage out to flip it, I realized that my cabbage was creating that gorgeous, buttery fresh bread scent. Even before I got a taste, my mouth was watering. If it smelled that good, how could it taste anything but wonderful?

To make it a meal, I sauteed some tofu, marinated in Braggs Liquid Aminos, and threw some pomegranate on top.

Let me tell you, I was not disappointed. The cabbage was a delight. Some of the outer leaves had crisped perfectly, adding a beautiful texture. The innermost leaves were the best, sweet and savory at the same time, while retaining a bit of the crisp texture cabbage is known for.

This is what it looked like. Love the deep colors!

I was a little annoyed when I realized that eating the pomegranate and tofu in the same bite as the cabbage overpowered the flavor of this exemplary vegetable. Because of this, though it was all in one bowl, I ate each element of my meal separately.

The only reason I was able to eat the last bite without sadness was that I knew the other half of the cabbage was waiting for tomorrow's dinner and a whole other head is waiting in the crisper drawer of my fridge.

Even if you don't like cabbage, give this a chance. It's a game changer!

Three Chips

I ate three chips today. It's not the first time I've deviated from the Eat to Live recommendations in the past 11 days - I had Taco Bell last Friday, a few pieces of chocolate here and there, and scattered spoonfuls of peanut butter. Those three chips do, however, mark the first time in this journey that I’ve eaten one of my “favorite” foods and found that it wasn’t satisfying. In fact, they tasted off, almost as if the oil in them had started going rancid.

Previously, I would have wanted to eat three more chips and three more chips and three more chips… Today, I had no desire to eat another chip. In fact, I just realized that I am not hungry at all, as in there is not a single type of food that I can think of that I want to eat right now. Considering the ginormous salad and half of a watermelon* I ate for lunch, I should not be surprised, but I am.

This not being hungry thing is a new experience for me. Even when I’ve been so stuffed full of food that I knew I shouldn’t eat another bite, that feeling often didn’t translate into “I don’t *want* another bite.” More often than I would like to admit, I’ve been at that point and still managed to shove justonemore French fry/bite of pizza/piece of candy down my gullet.

In fact, because of my seemingly endless capacity for food, I’ve never quite believed people when they stopped eating because they were full. I always thought they were enacting a crazy charade perpetuated by our culture of thinness, pushing away half full plates of delicious food to keep up appearances. More often than not, when I got a doggie bag, I did so because I didn’t want to appear disgusting to my fellow diners. I would often eat the leftovers immediately upon my arrival home.

That kind of eating had very little to do with fueling my body and very much to do with comforting or, more accurately, numbing myself. After a while, even when I didn’t want the numbing effect of too much food, it had become a habit I felt like I’d never be able to break.

I’m too wary to think I’ve fully broken the habit even now. Every day, I still think about stopping at Burger King or Taco Bell on my way home from work. It will take me many more than 11 days to feel confident that my addiction to highly-processed, food-like substances has been broken. It may even take more than 6 weeks. Yet, the fact that I did not crave more chips after those first few feels like a huge step in the right direction.

*Full disclosure: It was a tiny watermelon. I could hold it in my hand. It was smaller than a cantaloupe.

I'm About to Get Effusive Up in Here

I went for a run today. I readily admit that, despite my loud, obnoxiously announced commitment to a plan, today's run was my first in nearly two weeks. The days have gone by, I can't change the choices made in the past but I can move forward.

The three miles I ran today were the best in months.

The park was beautiful and nearly empty.

It was cold outside but the weather wasn't harsh.

The sun was shining and the sky was perfectly blue.

My body was ready to go. From the minute I started I felt better than I have in weeks and that feeling continued through the end of my run.

It was a true delight to be on the trail, feeling my legs and arms move in time to my breathing. I took joy in the activity in a way I haven't since October, at least.

Clockwise: A bridge halfway through my run; in front of a frozen pond at the trailhead after I finished; I love the park in the winter with no leaves; completely even splits!; NEON!

And, honestly, the only thing that has changed significantly has been my diet. Over the past five days, the vast majority of the food I've eaten has been unrefined plant foods instead of the steady stream of highly refined, fat-soaked food I'd been shoving down my gullet for the last half year.

Eating more healthfully has had a direct and almost immediate impact on both my desire to run and how well I am running. It's taking some practice and experimentation to make the food as appealing as I'd like it to be but I'm getting better and discovering some tricks that have made most of my meals delicious.

If you've been thinking about cleaning up your diet, I would encourage you to make the decision and take some concrete steps to make it a reality as soon as possible. You will not regret it.

Just Give Me Some Salt. Please!

Do you ever desperately wish that you'd never opened your mouth?

I'm feeling that today.

I wish I'd never told anyone anywhere ever that I was doing this (damn fool) Dr. Fuhrmann challenge because then no one would know if I quit. Perhaps that's why I announced it loudly and frequently to my friends and blog readers - it makes it that much harder to give in to my cravings for

A cheeseburger...

Homemade or from a great burger joint, not some crappy fast food imitation.

and a burrito the size of my head...

Chipotle would be best...

and some French fries.

Yes, those look sufficiently golden and crispy.

Interestingly, none of my cravings are for sweet things. I am madly craving salty, savory, rich flavors. Clearly, fat is pretty high on the ingredient list, too.

Hopefully, this doesn't sound like complaints. This is a choice I've made and I am going to stick to it but, I have to tell you, it's pretty freaking difficult.

I just keep reminding myself that, if I still crave them, all the salty, fatty, processed foods I want to eat in large amounts RIGHT NOW will be available when I'm done with this process. There's also the chance that I won't want them as much or at all and my health will be better for it.

Maybe I'm not doing a great job of sucking it up with running but I'm doing okay with food.

Now, off to eat my lunch of rice, peas, cauliflower, and acorn squash.

Three Days In

Dinner = a salad as big as my head

I am 1/14 of the way done with my 6 week Eat to Live challenge. A friend embarked on a similar endeavor recently and told me that the third day was, by far, the most difficult. I pray to God that she's right because I am not feeling that great right now.

There's nothing going on that concerns me but I'm definitely experiencing some of the unpleasant symptoms Dr. Fuhrmann warns off in his books: growly stomach, slight headache, occasional lightheadedness, desperate cravings, grumpiness, etc.

Fuhrmann attributes these symptoms to detoxification from all the sugar, caffeine, and fat consumed in the standard American diet. In his books, this is also called "toxic hunger" because they are signals for many people to eat something sweet or salty to experience the dopamine rush these foods, apparently, cause.

I only say "apparently" because I'm trying to experience the next six weeks as a skeptic and I haven't dug into all the studies Fuhrmann cites. So, while I don't want to take everything he says at face value, I am fully committed to following the plan for the entire six weeks unless a medical reason to stop arises.

I'll admit that my commitment almost crumbled when my co-workers decided to get take-out at our favorite place today. If I hadn't already been so vocal about this challenge with them, I might have decided to "cheat," which, for me, would have amounted to needing to start over.

There is room in Fuhrmann's plan for indulgences but, if I have the food I need available, I'm not going to deviate from the recommended foods within this six week period, no matter how sorely I am tempted. There is something inside me that wants this experiment to be as untainted as possible. Should get interesting when I'm traveling for work next month.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later: I had a delicious salad tonight and discovered the beauty of Bragg's Liquid Aminos as a substitute for sodium-laden soy sauce. I need to learn to stop eating when I'm full, though, instead of trying to continue eating because I haven't eaten the volume of food recommended. Overeating salad is so much more uncomfortable than overeating chocolate or pizza.

Six Weeks

I am starting a six-week eating challenge that begins tomorrow. The principles of the challenge can be found in Eat to Live and Eat for Health, by Dr. Joel Fuhrmann. I've been gradually making the move toward eating a diet rich in unrefined plant foods for six months or so and, after reading these books, decided to try something more radical to see how it goes.

I'll write more about the particulars of the Eat to Live plan in the next several days but for tonight, I wanted to mention what I'll be eating over the coming week.

Breakfasts
I've been drinking smoothies for breakfast since early November. I even took my Nutribullet along on Christmas vacation to continue the practice.

My normal recipe includes:
a large handful of greens (spinach, kale, mustard, collard, beet, etc.)
a banana
frozen fruit (cherries and blueberries currently)
a small handful of raw nuts
1 Tbsp ground flaxseed
a splash of vanilla extract
1 cup unsweetened soy milk

Lunches
1/2 to 1 cup brown rice
1 cup roasted acorn squash
several cups cooked vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, whatever I grab from the freezer)
homemade vegan Caesar dressing for the veggies
an orange

Dinners
a giant salad with:
romaine
tomatoes
onions
mushrooms
1/2 to 1 cup lentils
fresh parsley and dill
dried cranberries
homemade vegan ranch dressing
possibly some sauteed tofu

I'm actually more worried about being able to consume this large volume of food than worried that I won't be satisfied by it. The lack of large amounts of salt, sugar, and caffeine will probably cause some grumpiness as I adjust to this different way of eating.

My motivation for this change certainly includes weight loss but only because I know from experience that when I'm carrying less weight around, I feel better both mentally and physically. I'll be rather surprised if I don't lose weight over the next six weeks and I will be weighing myself once a week on Mondays. However, a lower number on the scale will not be my sole measure of success; I will be carefully tracking the way I feel throughout this experiment, as well.

Wish me luck! ...or maybe discipline and perseverance?

Have you ever embarked on a fast or "restrictive" diet for a set period of time? Why?
Did you continue any of the changes when the set period was over? 

Quitting Can Be Good, Right?

Okay, I want you to do something for me. Close your eyes.

Oh, wait, don't do that! Stop stop stop stop stop!

Pretend you have your eyes closed. That's better. Now imagine me, all geared up for running right down to the Garmin on my wrist.

Don't I look sporty and cute?

Now, imagine me, that sporty, cute woman, throwing a tantrum. Red-faced, jumping up and down, arms flailing, screaming at the top of my lungs, "I QUIT! I QUIT! IQUITIQUITIQUITIQUITIQUIT!!!"

You can stop imagining now. Really, stop. I know it's fun but I need you attention.

Though the scenario I asked you to imagine never happened, it was exactly what was happening in my head this morning.

As I drove to the park in which I often run only to find it closed, to another part of the same park to find that there are no trails in that section, then home, with the thought of running in my neighborhood, to be met by a cold, steady rain that has lasted for the past several hours.

There are people in my life, people I respect, who will read this and be tempted to tell me to, "Suck it up." Feel welcome to do so, though I doubt the effectiveness of that tactic. In fact, I doubt the effectiveness of any tactic.

I know it's probably not true but I feel like I've tried everything to motivate myself, down to reminding myself that motivation is completely overrated, but NONE OF IT IS WORKING!

My ability to resist my own resolve is staggering. My ability to ignore all evidence that exercise is good for me, to forget how much enjoyment and personal satisfaction I've obtained from it would be quite impressive if it weren't also depressing.

Come hell or high water, I am going to run my half marathon in May. But, for today, I quit.

There Are Perks

I have a new favorite movie. I'd seen it on the library shelf over the past few months but never decided to pick it up until I saw it at Target in the $5 bin.

To me, the movie and the book are all about finding the place you fit without trying too hard to fit in. That may or may not make sense but I'm not going to expound.

Because I loved the movie, I decided to read the book. I finished it in less than 4 hours.

Stephen Chbosky wrote the entire novel as a series of letters from the main character, Charlie, to an anonymous friend. Charlie is a smart kid who has some trouble "participating" in life because of how a couple incidents in his past, one recent and one more distant, have affected him.

Fortunately, with support from his family and friends, particularly Patrick and Sam, and a stint in the psychiatric ward, he's able to work through the hard times.

If you're cool with some young adult fiction, check out this book. Also, see the movie, which, according to Rotten Tomatoes, is a certified fresh, "heartfelt and sincere adaptation that's bolstered by strong lead performances."

Have you seen any great movies or read any fantastic books lately?

Cautiously Optimistic

In the past few months, there have been several times that I thought, "Hey, I'm getting back on top of this running thing!" There have even been a couple times that I announced as much to the world. This post is not like that.

This post is a very quiet, "Maybe I've got this thing going again."

On Monday, I started the base-building phase of my half marathon training plan. So far, I've stuck to the plan. I've done four runs (three as part of the plan) over the past week, for a total of 6 miles. The buildup feels so slow and lazy but I can tell that my body really needs to ease into this. Though I would prefer to head out for a 12-mile long run tomorrow, the scheduled 3 miles will have to do.

The first three workouts, I ran 1 minute, walked 1.

Yesterday, I switched to a 2:1 interval. There was only one run interval that I had to stop early and it was because I decided to sprint to finish my first mile and needed a little extra recovery.

So, it seems like I'm getting back into the swing of things. Which is good, since I have a half marathon approaching more quickly than I am willing to believe.

I have been feeling a little sore and tight. Next week, I'm going to add 1 session of strength training and 1 of yoga to my workout regimen. The ultimate goal will be to slowly work back up to actively working out 6 days per week, preferably with some two-a-days thrown in the mix.

I'm planning on shaking some things up with the way I eat shortly, too. Stay tuned.

Are you in training for any upcoming races?
How's it going? 

Looking Back, Moving Forward

Perhaps I did this in the wrong order but, after my last post (and my unplanned but much needed absence from blogging for the past couple weeks), I thought it would be good to have a look back at what I did this year: a celebration of my accomplishments with maybe a little thought about how I got off course near in the last few months.

Let's start with a couple photo collages (which I think are corny but un-ironically love the way I love cute birds and rainbows).

Bibs and medals and shirts... OH MY!

Some of my favorite running and racing moments: a few were solo but most involved friends.

This year, I completed 16 races: seven 5k's, with the fastest run in 31:51, two 10k's, the fastest being 1:26:03 on trails, one 10-miler in 1:56:18, four half marathons with a PR of 2:29:53, and one 18-miler, that didn't go as well as I would have liked.

For the first six months of 2013, discipline seemed to stream through my veins. Two-a-day workouts became the norm. I would run or do aerobics in the morning and strength training or flexibility in the afternoon, six days a week. As the summer wore on and got hotter, I maintained my running schedule with longer and longer distances but started dropping other parts of my training at the same time that I started consistently eating like crap.

There were significant changes at work and I think they affected me more than I realized. Instead of continuing to use exercise and diet to relieve my stress, I slowly returned to my previous habits of sitting, staring at various screens, and self-medicating with food. It didn't get as bad as it has been in the past (fast food for more than half my meals in a week and plenty of junky snacks in between) but the weight I'd lost started creeping back on, making most of my races during the last few months less than pleasant and not even close to fast.

Despite my lack of speed toward the end of the year, running still gave me the chance to do something healthy with friends, travel to fun places, and build a confidence in myself beyond what I've ever experienced.

And I'm happy to report that my desire to be healthy and fit were only on vacation and not the kind that Forrest Gump's mama describes. My motivation is slowly, but surely, returning as I gear up for my next goal race, the Frederick Half Marathon on May 4.

I ran 600 miles this year. Though I missed my goal of 750 by quite a bit, I still outstripped anything I've done in the past. The best part?

I'm just getting started! Here's to a new year full of possibility!

How was your year?
Did you have any goals - fitness-related or not?
Did you smash your goals or are you reflecting on what went wrong and gearing up to try again in 2014?

Setting Goals for 2014

December: it's the time to get all introspective and think about how the past year has gone and what we'll do better in the year to come. I'm introspective all.the.time. Perhaps even a bit of a navel-gazer... So, I enjoy this kind of exercise. What better activity is there on a snowy afternoon in the company of a sleepy cat, a newly decorated pine tree, and some Sufjan Christmas tunes than set some goals?

The past year has been very roller-coaster-y. I started out feeling really strong and focused, ran back-to-back half marathons in the spring, laid down nearly 100 miles on the road a few months in a row, but then it seemed like everything slowly fell apart.

Summer was brutal. Apparently, it wasn't even a hot summer by mid-Atlantic standards. I kept up the mileage until the end of July, eased up in August, and gave up in September, logging fewer miles over the past three months than I did in July alone.

Anyway, I have been trying to put the disappointment I've felt about my progress behind me so that I can move forward. In that spirit, I'm working through setting goals for the coming year because I'm being taught and re-taught the lesson that you can't hit a goal that doesn't exist.

Here goes...

Fitness Goals:

1. Run consistently and injury free.
2. Set a personal record in the half marathon (current PR: 2:29:54).
3. Reduce my overall time for the RW Hat Trick by 60 minutes or more (current time 5:27:07).
4. Practice yoga at least one time per week.
5. Do strength training at least two times per week.

Diet Goals:

1. Continue the transition to plant-based eating, cutting out fish by the end of the year.
2. Lose 40 pounds for the sake of my overall health and my fitness goals.
3. Limit eating out to three meals or fewer per week.

Life Goals:

1. Participate in at least one social activity per week, not including lunch with co-workers.
2. Pay off another student loan.
3. Travel to a new place, whether a state or country.
4. Read at least one book per month.
5. Join a CSA.
6. DANCE!

Now, the work begins.

Do you set goals at any point during the year or do you fly by the seat of your pants?
Have you charted your course for 2014 or do you prefer to wait until closer to year's end?
What is(are) your biggest goal(s) for the coming year? Mine are in red above.

Thanksgiving: Vegetarian Style

When I decided to try this vegetarian thing (which has been going quite well apart from those five meals with copious amounts of shrimp), I didn't really think about the upcoming holidays. Then, they were upon me.

I've used all of my vacation time this year to travel long distances to run or work, so I decided that this four-day Thanksgiving weekend would be the perfect time to stay at home and chill. An added bonus to this plan was the ability to cook my own holiday feast and not have to explain or discuss my plant-based diet at a time of year when so many tables feature giant roasted turkeys and hams.

(Which reminds me, I should probably break the news to my mom before I head home for Christmas.)

Not eating turkey on Thanksgiving wasn't much of a change for me. I do love a drumstick but the parts of the meal that I enjoy the most are stuffing and potatoes. Carby goodness!

Replace the chicken stock with veggie stock in the stuffing and it was perfect - just like my mom makes.

The mirepoix might be my favorite part of my favorite dish: stuffing.

Parsley, sage, and rosemary but no thyme.

In honor of Thanksgivukkah, I bypassed the traditional mashed potatoes and made latkes instead with the Smitten Kitchen recipe. For added flare, I used purple potatoes.

I used a red onion, too. It just seemed right. Could this be construed as supporting the Ravens?

The purple coloration was pretty noticeable, even after cooking.

Brussels sprouts are my favorite vegetable. So, when I found this recipe on Thug Kitchen (If you click the link, be ready for some cursing - TK is not the traditional cooking blog.), I knew I wanted to make it as the centerpiece of my Thanksgiving meal. They were a gorgeous part of the line-up.

Someone told me I wouldn't be able to make a Thanksgiving feast without meat.

I beg to differ.

What's your favorite Thanksgiving dish?
How do you feel about Brussels sprouts?

Official Race Recap: Millersville Turkey Trot Repeat

I ran my last planned race of the year and my first ever repeated race yesterday. If I'd had my druthers, I might have skipped this one, despite having paid for registration a month ago.

Fortunately, for me, my roommate needed an early morning ride to the airport, a friend was expecting me to pick her up for the race, and a few other friends were expecting to meet up at the race.

So, I woke up at 5 a.m., drove Larissa to BWI, gassed up the Chevy, and headed north.

I fetched my friend, LaToya, around 6:30 and we hustled up to Lancaster. Along the way, we had a great conversation about what we would do if we won the lottery - $100M plus jackpot, of course.

We got to Penn Manor High around 8:20. Last year, there was a huge influx of last-minute entries and the start time got held up by 20 minutes or so. The race organizers learned from last year and worked out some packet pick-up kinks so that everything got started right on time this year. We were all grateful given that the temperature was about 30 degrees cooler this year than last.

The start came pretty unexpectedly, no loud noises or announcements. All of a sudden, we were moving forward. For the first half mile, I was doing okay. In fact, I was at a pretty good 11-minute mile pace. It didn't last long but it felt good until it didn't.

Definitely no negative splits for this race but I'm glad I did it. And I'm glad that I had friends there to do it with me or, at least, meet me at the finish and remind me that where I am now isn't where I have to stay.

LaToya and I didn't plan to have almost exactly the same headband. :)

Me, Stacey, Rose, and LaToya post-race

Post-race selfie with Stacey - we've started a new tradition.

A Major Victory

I went for a walk today.

Big fat hairy deal, right?

The fact is, though, that over the past 2 months, my level of physical activity has decreased significantly.

I got tired and anxious and, instead of doing things I knew would make me feel better, like running or yoga, I sat in front of my computer or the television and watched more TV than any human should ever be exposed to.

Today, I got home, changed my clothes, despite the protesting voices in my brain, and headed out for a nice, brisk 30-minute walk.

Maybe this first step can't be considered a major victory but it feels like the beginning of something good.

Culinary Delights

I run/walked two mile today. It was not fun. I did not enjoy it. It was the first time I'd run in 12 days. I spent the entire time encouraging myself that it will be good again some day. Now, on to happier things.

Cooking is my favorite, so this weekend was a treat.

After a trip to the grocery store yesterday morning to purchase the necessary supplies, I started by soaking some black-eyed peas.

While those were hanging out, I put a yam and some beets in the oven to roast.

In the interim, I prepped an onion and a red pepper and tons of garlic for use in my vegetarian refritos (that's fancy talk for "refried beans").

As the beans cooked, I mashed up the yams and added some taco seasoning.

Once the beans were ready, the smell of sauteing onion and garlic filled my kitchen. When they were softened, I added the beans and combined everything with a potato masher.

After a round of dishes, I cut up carrots and sugar snap peas, added the roasted beets and some freshly fried tofu, and marinated it all with thyme vinaigrette.

That was it for last night.

This morning, I started by making a medium bowl of guacamole with plenty of onion and garlic and maybe a little too much lime.

At the same time, some brown rice, onions, garlic, lime, and vegetable stock were simmering in a large skillet.

Of everything I made, the only dish that didn't turn out exactly as I was expecting was the rice. It tastes alright but the texture leaves much to be desired. {Someone needs to teach me how to make brown rice that isn't simultaneously glue-y and partially uncooked.}

Here's the end result: Crazy Delicious Yam-Filled Quesadillas

Yams, refried beans, and cheese inside. Rice, tomatoes, guacamole, and sour cream on top. All in my belly now.

I'm already in planning stages for next week's adventures in cooking! Lentils will definitely be involved, possibly some chickpeas.

PLEASE, someone, teach me how to cook rice.

Eight Things You Might Not Know About Me

This is a meme over on Facebook. I wrote it there but I added the pictures here. Aren't you lucky, blogfriends?

1. I was in show choir for three out of four years of high school and participated in at least 4 musicals, possibly 6. I can't quite remember. (definitely Guys 'n' Dolls, Hello Dolly, Godspell, and Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat)

This is an actual photo of my actual high school music teacher. I swiped it from his website.

2. I once watched Sense & Sensibility 6 times in 5 days, so it's probably not surprising that I can quote almost the entire movie from memory. I could watch it every day for the rest of my life and never tire of it.

 

3. My Meyers-Briggs type is INTP and, secretly, I think that makes me better than you, unless you're also an INTP. Don't worry, I know it's not true.

Some say Einstein was an INTP. I am inclined to agree.

 4. I recently watched every episode of Supernatural straight through twice in my spare time. (This fact does not fill me with pride.) Sam and Dean's voices became so familiar that, for a while after finishing, I felt like I'd lost a friend or loved one.

Loved it when Sam still looked like a college kid.

5. Jack Black and John Cusack are my two biggest celebrity crushes.

Jack

John

6. Men with beards make me incredibly happy. In fact, I wish that all men could and would grow their whiskers.

Huh...What? Your gorgeous facial hair distracted me.

7. Despite the fact that I haven't run a single step in almost two weeks and I despair of finding the motivation to start again, I remain convinced that I will be in shape to complete my fifth half marathon by early May and have also been looking up more races for 2014.

It's just 13.1; NBD.

8. I hate light. When people come into dimly lit rooms in which I am reading and turn the lights on in an effort to be kind to me, I curse them in my mind. Driving at night is my favorite until there is oncoming traffic with their stupid headlights. Summer is the worst because the night is so short.

KILL THE LIGHTBULBS!!!

Tell me something I don't know about you. Should be easy for all you lurkers. :)

Lesson Learned

Our beautiful halal truck.

I can't remember how long we've been going there but several co-workers and I have developed the habit of visiting a halal food truck about a block from our office. With 47 reviews on Yelp, they have a 4.5 star rating. The food is plentiful, cheap, and delicious and the the men who prepare and serve it are very friendly. They know us and what we'll order. I always get lamb over rice with white sauce and no hot sauce. It's the first place I've ever been a regular.

We get halal when someone needs to be cheered up or when we're celebrating. There have even been jokes made about the stars aligning for halal - one was even posted on our quote board for a while. Trips to the halal truck are sometimes delayed a day because we want to make sure everyone who loves it is included in the trip. Other times, we've just gone two days in a row. We like it enough that we walk right past another halal food truck on the way.

My regular order - except I don't get hots.

Unfortunately, the halal truck doesn't have any readily available vegetarian options. I considered asking them to piece together various parts of other meals to make a vegetarian meal for me but, instead, I decided to have one last halal. I thought, "Hey, you didn't know your last halal was your last halal. One last time will be okay."

Boy, was I wrong. After two weeks of no greasy meat, the giant (super-delicious) tureen of lamb and white sauce I ate left my stomach terribly unhappy. For the rest of the afternoon, I was groggy and my stomach hurt. I could probably re-acclimate to greasy meat if I wanted to but I'm going to take it as a sign that my body prefers to avoid it. Though meat tastes so good, I'm beginning to think I feel better when I avoid it.

I don't want to give up the hall truck but I may have to become *that* person who asks for something special - I think I'll try rice, pita, salad, and white sauce for a start - and daydream that in years to come my "special" will catch on and be added to the menu.

What foods have you given up that made you almost regret making healthier choices?

Cheater, Cheater, Shrimp Purse Eater

Mmmm...shrimp purses

Since October 30, I've been eating a plant-based diet. It hasn't been that difficult since I love veggies and I haven't given up dairy.

One of the reasons I've not pursued a vegetarian diet before was that I didn't want to inconvenience others. Yes, I recognize it was a silly reason for not doing something that primarily impacts my life and health, but it was something I took into consideration.

So far, I've found that most people are interested in my choice rather than disturbed or annoyed by it. Of course, I have heard anecdotes about relatives and friends who were vegetarian and developed various deficiencies and began eating meat again as a result.

It's a similar phenomenon to all the well-meaning people who share similar anecdotes about friends and relatives who ruined knees and backs and feet through running.

I appreciate the concern shown and do my best to steer the conversations toward the positive reasons for my decisions and the improvements I've seen in my life and health.

Though it has only been 11 days, I've learned a couple things:

1. When ordering at a restaurant, if there is a meat option with a similar name to the vegetarian dish you are ordering, be very clear that you are asking for the vegetarian option. Otherwise, the waiter is very likely to bring you a heaping bowl of seafood primavera when you ordered pasta primavera.
2. Which leads to my second observation: It's amazing how many people consider seafood a vegetarian option. This has puzzled me for many years but seems even more baffling now.  I can see why people use the term plant-based diet; apparently, it's a lot clearer to the non-vegetarian.
3. In a well-balanced diet, a vegetarian meal doesn't look all that different from a meal with meat included. All week, my plate was filled with greens, fresh fruits and veggies, nuts, homemade bread, yogurt, and other delights. While my co-workers added salmon or chicken to the mix, the majority of their meals looked exactly like mine.

Anyone else notice how small the meat segment is in this pie? And that the FISH is there?

Also, confession time, I ate some shrimp last night. It was a conscious decision. After grocery shopping (I'll never do that on a Saturday night again!), I got some Wegmans Chinese food and was really craving some shrimp purses. All of the other items I got fit within my plant-based diet. After resisting bacon and ham all week at my work retreat, I decided it was alright to indulge one craving if it could help ease my transition to vegetarian eating.

Vegetarians: Did you indulge any cravings as you transitioned away from meat?
Non-vegetarians: Is meat the center of your meal or merely a part? 

Anxiety

Though I am not a generally anxious person, I do have occasional bouts with depression and anxiety. Sometimes, I don't even realize I'm anxious until I start to feel like I'm having a stroke or a heart attack.

It started yesterday afternoon. For a while, it felt like someone was pulling the skin and muscles on the left side of my neck taut. Then the left side of my face felt numb. Then my left arm. There wasn't any pain, just semi-tingly numbness.

If my mood is already tending toward anxiety, my brain will focus intensely on minor aches and pains and scroll through a long list of diseases or conditions I might have based on the symptoms I (believe I) am experiencing.

The problem is that once my brain fixates on a particular symptom or condition, it will amplify that symptom and create others. A further problem is that it's not easy to tell the difference between real and perceived symptoms. So, how am I supposed to decide which symptoms of impending death deserve medical attention?

Our brains are powerful instruments - they can do wonderful and terrible things.

During a particularly difficult time in my life, a few years ago, I was so convinced that I was having a heart attack that I drove myself to the hospital at 1 a.m. This example shows how rational my thoughts are when I'm in this downward spiral.

When I was running/exercising regularly, even when my life was stressful, I didn't experience this type of anxiety. I suppose that's another item to add to the list of reasons I need to become active again...

Have you ever experienced anxiety/depression?
What did you do to cope?

Vegetarian Noms

It's only been three days without meat but, today, I was feeling tempted to go to Chipotle and get a giant steak burrito. I considered getting a veggie burrito instead but then I remembered the scads of delicious, already-purchased food in my house.

Though I already had a ridiculous amount of cassoulet prepared, I decided to use up some other ingredients that were hanging out in my pantry: an avocado, a leek, several cloves of garlic, a handful of grape tomatoes, and a bunch of fresh parsley.

I quickly sauteed the garlic, leek, and tomatoes until the leeks were softened. I added the cooked ingredients to my Nutribullet, along with the parsley and avocado, and blended until smooth. With the addition of some salt, freshly ground pepper, and chili powder, I had something like guacamole, only mellower.

Alongside a grilled cheese and avocado sandwich and some Food Should Taste Good Olive Chips, I had a scrumptious and satisfying dinner.

See?!

My sandwich cutting skills left something to be desired tonight.