This Always Happens

I've been eating more responsibly since near the end of April.

Now I'm tired of it.

I want to eat great big bowls of spaghetti covered in meat sauce and cheese. After that, I want cinnamon rolls or apple crisp with piles of whipped cream, not just one serving but two, maybe three.

This time ALWAYS comes. It's fun to eat right...for a while.

Some of you may be wondering if I just need to relax on the food, give myself a break. The thing is, I do. And, when I do, it just makes me want to "cheat" even more.

I'm okay with the way I need to eat to be healthy and fit until I let myself have sweets or french fries or pizza or any of the other things that used to make up my entire diet.

Old habits are fabled to die hard, but I think mine only suffer temporary defeats, after which they go into hiding to gather their strength and prepare for a new attack.

I guess it's time for me to prepare a counter-attack.

Die, habits, die!

Advice gladly accepted.

Dog Days Are Over

Florence + The Machine is one of my favorite bands these days. AND they happen to have written one of my favorite (running) songs.

Here are the lyrics:

Happiness hit her like a train on a track;
Coming towards her, stuck still, no turning back.
She hid around corners and she hid under beds,
She killed it with kisses and from it she fled.
With every bubble, she sank with her drink
And washed it away down the kitchen sink.

CHORUS: The dog days are over
The dog days are done.
The horses are coming
So you better run.

CHORUS 2: Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers.
Leave all your love and your longing behind,
You can't carry it with you if you want to survive.


And I never wanted anything from you

Except everything you had and what was left after that too, oh
Happiness hit her like a bullet in the back
Struck from a great height by someone who should know better than that

The dog days are over

The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

and CHORUS (X2)

A couple of weeks ago, I was running in the rain, and this song came on my iPod. Those of you who know me, know that I'm pretty good at keeping emotional demonstrations in check but I couldn't stop myself from crying as this song played and I continued to run. (Like the Everly Brothers before me, "[I] do my crying in the rain.")

I was completely overwhelmed by the idea of happiness coming after me, seeking me out, insisting on being a part of my life. And I had this revelation that by running (and practicing yoga and eating right and spending time with people and the list goes on) I'd stopped running from happiness, joy, love, and lots of other good things.

There are a lot of interpretations of this song and most seem to have the common thread of running from an abusive relationship. Perhaps that's a proper interpretation but it doesn't ring true for me; I just hear the "warning" that happiness is coming - whether I like it or not. I think I'll like it.

The dog days are indeed over.

Brooks = Commitment

Brooks Adrenaline GTS12 - 11.5D
It's been a long time since I bought new sneakers. I can't even remember when I purchased the pair of Adidas that will be on their way to a donation bin shortly since they are a size and a half too small and far too narrow for comfort. The price I paid for them also escapes me, though I'm sure it was probably pretty cheap.

A couple weeks ago, after having completed two weeks of the Couch to 5K (C25K) program, I knew that the hiking shoes I was wearing wouldn't cut it as the jogging time in the workouts increased and the walking time decreased.

I had a decision to make. I'd flirted with running in the past, purchased cheap-ish, ill-fitting shoes from the clearance rack at DSW, and given up before I'd even really gotten started. I had to decide whether this was another flirtation or if I was ready to make a commitment to running.

About a week and a half ago, I headed to Fleet Feet in Pikesville for a shoe fitting. The woman who helped me, did an analysis of my gait, took several measurements, handed me a pair of socks to use, and then dragged out a pile of shoes for me to try on. She gently placed each pair on my feet, tied them, and then let me take a lap around the store. The Brooks Adrenaline were the third pair I tried. Another woman came into the store as I was trying them; she was wearing the same pair. She didn't even ask to try anything else, she just asked for another pair of Brooks. None of the other pairs I tried even came close to the comfort I felt with the Brooks on my feet; it was as if I wasn't even wearing shoes.

We tried a few more pairs, making forays into men's footwear since my feet are so big and wide, but there was always some part of the shoe that pinched or rubbed or just felt wrong. The salesperson had me try the Brooks on a second time, just to be sure. I was.

With my Brooks on, I was ready to make a commitment: Running is now a part of my life... least, until these shoes wear out.