I've just finished reading Through Painted Deserts, by Donald Miller. This is the second book I've read by Don and just like Blue Like Jazz, it hit me where I live.
The theme that hit me hardest was the idea of "believing the commercials." Our (my) society has been completely sucked in by the idea that having more stuff (iPod) or eating at certain restaurants (mmm...Chipotle...mmm) or going on fancy vacations or any of the other lies the advertising agencies share with us will make us feel better (or at least different) about ourselves, that we will have a better life because we possess some magical "IT."
My trap is stuff. I think that the next purse or the next pair of shoes will make me complete. Obviously, I'm not stupid, I know ultimately, it will make no difference, but I dare to dream.
I want it out of my system. Sometimes I feel like it's gone. I don't buy anything stupid for weeks, even months. Then, I decide one thing I want is alright and it starts the cycle of spending to make myself happy all over again.
God, help me be responsible. Help me understand that I don't need any thing to make me happy or contented.
I'm Not a Blogger
I wonder if anyone reads this blog. None of my friends knows about it, so it seems unlikely that I am developing a huge audience.
I've been thinking a lot about my faith lately. Brian McLaren's book, Generous Orthodoxy, is resonating somewhere deep in my soul. He's written so much that I completely agree with, but could barely express without using the phrase "I don't know" every other sentence.
It seems that is part of the point of the Emergent Church movement; the ability to admit one's lack of understanding seems paramount. How could it be otherwise in discussions about God? Every day I become more convinced that what little I think I know about following Jesus
is probably mostly wrong.
I have a Livejournal account. I wrote about my interest in the Emergent Church movement and someone had the nerve to (anonymously) ask me if I really wanted to go to seminary. I was under the impression that seminary was not a place in which to be indoctrinated, but a place in which to grow in our understanding of God and our ability to help others along their faith journey as well. Alas, I'm not terribly surprised that I got such a reaction.
I just hope that attending seminary will help me to better serve the world.
I've been thinking a lot about my faith lately. Brian McLaren's book, Generous Orthodoxy, is resonating somewhere deep in my soul. He's written so much that I completely agree with, but could barely express without using the phrase "I don't know" every other sentence.
It seems that is part of the point of the Emergent Church movement; the ability to admit one's lack of understanding seems paramount. How could it be otherwise in discussions about God? Every day I become more convinced that what little I think I know about following Jesus
is probably mostly wrong.
I have a Livejournal account. I wrote about my interest in the Emergent Church movement and someone had the nerve to (anonymously) ask me if I really wanted to go to seminary. I was under the impression that seminary was not a place in which to be indoctrinated, but a place in which to grow in our understanding of God and our ability to help others along their faith journey as well. Alas, I'm not terribly surprised that I got such a reaction.
I just hope that attending seminary will help me to better serve the world.
I've done it.
I'm officially an applicant at Princeton Theological Seminary. Now the waiting begins. I'm pretty good at waiting.
Stupid, stupid, stupid
Only two years out of college and I already feel like I've lost all of my intellectual prowess. Writing a short essay about myself is simply killing me.
Part of it is that I feel like everything I write comes out in Idiot.
Part of it is that I don't feel worthy to apply to such a prestigious school.
Part of it is that I'm beginning to realize just how little of this whole process I control.
Control is one of my weaknesses. I like to be the one calling the shots. It's not that I'm bossy...ask anyone, I'm not. It's just that I like knowing what's going to happen.
I hate writing for an audience I don't know.
Part of it is that I feel like everything I write comes out in Idiot.
Part of it is that I don't feel worthy to apply to such a prestigious school.
Part of it is that I'm beginning to realize just how little of this whole process I control.
Control is one of my weaknesses. I like to be the one calling the shots. It's not that I'm bossy...ask anyone, I'm not. It's just that I like knowing what's going to happen.
I hate writing for an audience I don't know.
The Interview
I have an interview tonight. It is for admission to Princeton Theological Seminary. I'm not traveling to Princeton, because they set up something with an alum in my area. She's a pastor at a local Presbyterian Church. The picture of her on the church website looks friendly. Let's hope they didn't just catch her on a good day.
I bought a new black corduroy suit for the interview. It annoys me (just a little bit) that my current wardrobe wouldn't suit. There is a suit in my closet already, but it's too big since I lost 50 pounds. Too bad I only got to wear it about 6 times.
Right now, I am wishing that I had more experience being interviewed. I also wish I knew what this woman was going to ask. It would make me feel a lot more confident if I could do some research. Though, I suppose that would defeat the purpose of the interview...making people think on their feet and all that.
I bought a new black corduroy suit for the interview. It annoys me (just a little bit) that my current wardrobe wouldn't suit. There is a suit in my closet already, but it's too big since I lost 50 pounds. Too bad I only got to wear it about 6 times.
Right now, I am wishing that I had more experience being interviewed. I also wish I knew what this woman was going to ask. It would make me feel a lot more confident if I could do some research. Though, I suppose that would defeat the purpose of the interview...making people think on their feet and all that.
Just born
This is the official birthday of my new blog. I like to write everything just as I would say it.
Hopefully, this blog will give me a chance to ponder. Maybe it will even be a place where I can think new thoughts I've never thought before. Here's hoping someone will read my ramblings.
Hopefully, this blog will give me a chance to ponder. Maybe it will even be a place where I can think new thoughts I've never thought before. Here's hoping someone will read my ramblings.
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